Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Randomize
