you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
