wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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