Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
