You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
