super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize