We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
