If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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