Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
