Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
