you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
