so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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