so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I think people are normalizing furries
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
