Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
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They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
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Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.