thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
