I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
