my vag is so smooth its legendary
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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