Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
