Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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