i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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