So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
