She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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