so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
