Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
