C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
