do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
