Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
It's just like the Real World with babies
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
