This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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