Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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