oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
