if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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