I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
