Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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