none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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