I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
