That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Oh god it's open bar.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
