I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
