last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
