Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
