is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
