Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I miss vodka workout Fridays
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
