they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I just pynch a tree in the face
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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