# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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