Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
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