The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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