I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
