just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
