hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
A+ Viking dick