Please, let me fuck your mom
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I fill condoms, not promises.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
3 2 1 whiskey
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
