Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
