Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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