i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I need to calm my uterus...
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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